Saturday, July 19, 2008

I never would have thought.


that Tori Spelling and I have something in common.

but we do!!! we so do!!!

ok. you all know by now that I have a sweet new baby. along with a baby comes the FUN of feeding every 3 or so hours. so while feeding her I always hideout in my bedroom so that a) if anyone drops by unannounced I won't be embarrased. and b) so that I can watch tv while feeding the little (ok not so little... more info. on that later) peanut.

alright so you do the math: that is a lot of tv watching. seriously. I tried reading because I am sure that's much more productive... but I hate it. reading is like homework to me. so I dedicated myself to HGTV. UNTIL I COULDN'T STAND TO WATCH ONE MORE re-decorated/re-painted/re-furbished/re-EVERYTHINGED house...... so I went channel surfing. I ran into this little gem on the Oxygen channel: "Tori and Dean: Home Sweet Hollywood." Yes, it is a reality show following Tori Spelling, her husband Dean something (I think he might be famous?) and their son Liam.

I am hooked. It is basically hilarious. I mean, these people are for REAL and yet the whole time I keep thinking "these people can't be for real." ANYWAY........ in a recent episode, Liam starts swimming lessons. Everytime he put his little face in the water, Tori gasps. Huge annoying (but totally not on purpose!) gasps. She then follows the footage with the commentary that she is a huge gasper. If anything could possibly endanger her child -- she gasps. OH MY GOSH!!! THIS IS ME!!! I am a gasper. It is so embarrasing, but I seriously can't help it.

Take for example, just the other day on Hailey's last day of swimming lessons she was going off the low dive. Now keep in mind Hailey can't swim. This is her first year of lessons. She did great -- but is not even CLOSE to swimming. Every time her instructor had her try to swim to him she would sink. So -- I am a little paranoid that my child is going off the low dive with her only life saving device being the noodle they tied around her waist. Sure there was a lifeguard in the pool... but there are also roughly a million other children.... So just as she is going off the diving board for the 3rd or 4th time -- I express to my husband (again!) how nervous it makes me. And then it happened! Her noodle came off. GAAAAAAAASP!!!!!!! I am sure that people thought that I was having a heart attack. OK, so I sort of was!!! HELLO -- my little girl -- ON HER BIRTHDAY -- is going to DROWN!!!!!! I literally jumped of the bleachers and ran marathon style to the other end of the pool, gasping gasping gasping the whole way. I couldn't even get words out. Just huge gasps and me pointing at the deep end.

The funny thing: Hailey didn't panic. At all. She calmly grabbed the edge of her noodle and kicked her way to the side.

Now talk about feeling foolish. I should have taken a bow at that point -- don't you think? But I mean, seriously, it scared me half to death.

Do any of you do this? Are you an over-panicker and a gasper just like myself and Tori Spelling?

So I guess I should say: Tori Spelling (I KNOW you read my blog!!! come on -- I watch your show...) since we seem to have something in common, if you are ever in the area -- give me a call, let's do a playdate. We can totally gasp the day away.

15 comments:

Adrienne Hansen said...

you are crazy. i love you.

also-you didn't mention about the not so little paigey...

Tori said...

ha ha i love it!! I watched like all of the episodes last Sunday... totally funny!! Go Amy!

Unknown said...

so funny!

Lucy said...

my sisters' a total gasper. It's fine. It's you, and what a fun show! i'll have to find it sometime!

Q and T McKnight said...

Love the new post! It's great to see we have more in common than just our compulsive behavior and extreme organization - we are gaspers! I use to do that with my kids all the time. Now I do it with my granddaughter Isabella, and yes, I have done it with Quinn. I remember driving down the road one day and Quinn was sitting in the drivers seat. A car pulled out in front of us so I had to slam on my brakes. In addition, I instantly threw my fist and arm over across Quinn's chest (to save him, of course). Quinn was so insulted and, of course, as a mom it was just habit.

Amy, I love reading your BLOG - you so crack me up!

Nancy said...

Amster - I would love to hop in Nanner's car and come, but I am OLD and I have already been to Querque and Florida and Michigan and Ohio and the last 2 car trips about did this old back in... so I will just send along goodies for the little ones and hugs and kisses and hope I can see you all when you come back to Funcie for Christmas :)xoxoxo BTW, I love it that you and Tori are so much alike. Haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah

Meesa said...

I am a devout gasper. My poor kids are going to grow up thinking a gasp is part of everyday speech. This morning I looked out my window to see what Thomas was up too. I see a dog running down the street and about 100 feet behind Thomas running as fast as he can to catch the dog, I GASP and fling the window open. Thank goodness it was on the second floor or I might have gone through it!

daisy said...

I am more of a Ughhhhhh person. I do this a lot usually when my kids bug me to do something like make them lunch. I must do it A LOT because Maggie has started doing it as well. "Maggie go and get your diaper so I can change you." "Ughhhhhh" So that's fun.

Shayne said...

Luckily for you you don't have "horse face" in common. You are cute and she is not.

Shayne said...

Congrats Amy. I awarded you a Blogsie on my Blog. Amazing I know.

Emily said...

I am the worst gasper ever. My husband hates it. I always freak him out. I'll gasp at something and, for a second, he'll wonder which one of us is about to die. Of course, none of us are in any real danger at all.

nan said...

waiting for another entry... maybe about our terrific visit with all of you!!! :) WE MISS YOU!!!!

JLJ said...

Now that I think about it, I guess I am a gasper. But about really stupid things, like when I'm on the phone making a dentist appointment and I suddenly remember I already had something planned that date, so I gasp super loud and the lady on the other end of the phone nearly has a heart attack because she thinks I've just witnessed an accident and am hurt. I'm so embarrassed that I have something in common with Tori Spelling. And BTW that is a name I haven't thought of for at least 10 years before reading this post.

TheQueen@TerrorsInTiaras said...

I can't believe I didn't comment on this. Because you are too funny. My hubby is a bigger gasper than me. It's hilarious.
I've been looking at your blog and missing you all so much. What a darling family you have. Hugs!

Anonymous said...

Tori Spelling is so not even close to your category.... it is like comparing a worm to an Angel. You are much more advanced, especially7 since your COMING TO UTAH!!!!!